Today I put my lavalier back on

Last semester I was working in the barn a lot ( I was responsible for the daily care of 7 horses).  I was starting to get a rash on my neck all around where the chain of my lavalier hung.  So I took it off and put it in my jewelry box.  And that is where it stayed until today.

This action came to symbolize a period in my life for me.  This period in my life was one where I let go of all of my Alpha Chi Omega values, support, and experiences.  I spent little to no time around my sisters and I did not attend very many chapter events.  Yeah, I was always busy during these things I missed, but I probably could have worked to change that.  I gave no excuses, had no regrets, and had a generally bad attitude.  For this and other reasons I won't get in to, I wanted to leave.  I had planned to.  My feelings were hurt when I was thinking about leaving Alpha Chi, because I felt like no one noticed or cared.  But I was the one who didn't care.  I wouldn't have given someone the time of day if they had tried to talk to me.  They probably did, not that I noticed.  It was all on me.  I don't like to go back on promises I make, so I was planning to stay until after recruitment, after my duties as a pi chi (recruitment counselor) were over.  I know I've said this before, but I will say it again.  I truly believe everything happens for a reason.  Being a Pi Chi was my saving grace.  If not for that, I would have left behind my sisterhood, my friends, and one of the most important things in my life.  All because I was having serious trouble balancing things. 

I took my lavalier off first, but then I stopped wearing my letters all together.  My AXO t-shirts were buried in the bottom of my drawers, my AXO bags were left unused, and my heart was somewhere else too.


I went through a pretty tough time, I don't like to share those things with other people though. I tend to turn inward on myself and just get quiet.  It took some seriously great friends to get me through this and I'm thankful for them.  These new friends I made changed parts of my outlook on life.  I needed them so badly then and I can't believe I was without them for so long. 

At the end of the summer, I tried not to think about how it would feel to be back, really back, here.  But when I was here I immediately felt the exact same way when I stepped through the doors two years ago for the first time.  I belong here and I think part of me has always known that.  Sometimes it just gets lost in the mess of life.  Shortly after I was back here I had to leave again to fulfill 'duties' of a Pi Chi (recruitment counselor).  I temporarily moved in with 12 members of different sororities.  I had thought living with these women was going to be awkward, uncomfortable, and stressful even.  But it was AMAZING.  We bonded over silly youtube videos and a common love of Greek Life.  We shared every second together and couldn't have gotten along any better!  We laughed so hard ALL THE TIME.  It reminded me of how it was to bond with my AXO sisters in the beginning.  These women helped spread and share the love for Greek Life with the new students.  It reminded me of how much I want to change what the world thinks of sororities and how much I truly, deeply love everything they stand for.  It was these women who reminded me the strength and love that grows from the bonds of sisterhood.  Nothing will ever compare to the experiences I have been fortunate enough to have through Alpha Chi Omega and I cannot imagine being who I am today without it. 

Much like my veganism, I know people don't understand this and it's something I care about with all my heart.     

Eventually, my attitude changed. I started thinking about all the things Alpha Chi had taught me.  All the things I had experienced.  And then I thought about what I'd be without out Alpha Chi Omega. And I'm a creative person, but I literally could not imagine myself without it.  Someone once told me, "You radiate the spirit of you chapter" and someone told my sister "Katie is going Alpha Chi, we just know it"  Even before I knew it.  I am an Alpha Chi Omega.  And I ALWAYS will be. And Today I put my lavalier back on. 
  LITB <3 

Cedarledge

After nine weeks of camp I was glad to be finished with the being hot all the time, waking up early, and those kids that just drive you nuts! But that is nothing compared to all the things I will miss.  Summer has been my haven, my sanctuary, my serenity for as long as I can remember.  Being inside the 'bubble' of the summer camp world you miss out on pretty much everything else.  Sometimes getting back into the swing of the 'real world' can be rough, but it has always been worth the days I get to spend at Cedarledge. I cannot describe the love I feel for the experiences I have had.  Everyone should go to camp.  Seriously.  It has influenced my life more than anything else. 

Cedarledge has been my home since 1997.  I have loved spending every summer there.  I grew up at there.  I can look back at my life at camp and see how things I've experienced and people I have known changed who I am now.  Camp has made me a better person.  I have made amazing friends that I will have for the rest of my life.  I have even met campers who have influenced my life. And I hope more then anything that I have done the same for them. 

When I have to leave the world of summer camp and move on with my 'real life'  I don't how I will do it.  My summers have been filled with camp since I was in first grade!  I wish I could stay forever, but I know my summers at Cedarledge are numbered.  When I leave I know a piece of Cedarledge will stay with me, and part of me will always desire to have another summer there.  I have no doubt that it will be one of the hardest things I will ever do when I decide to leave camp forever.  But I won't be sad.  I will remember the moments that changed my life and hope the traditions of Cedarledge continue and change the lives of many more girls for the better. 

I had an amazing summer, better than I ever imagined.  I STILL cannot believe it's over!  I'll miss being at camp and all the fun from this summer.  I am thankful to everyone who made this summer what it was.

I love my Cedarledge family!  <3
-Orion Out!

                                          My first time at Cedarledge '97

                                          Cedarledge 2011

My heart ache

Green Trees & Taps
For over half my life these words have made my heart ache.  Not in a bad way, in a longing, remembering, loving way.  To me these words symbolize the end.  The end of another summer, another chapter, another friendship.
I know that when I sing my last Green Trees & Taps my life will be beginning a new chapter.  I will be saying goodbye to summer as I know it.
  As a student I have lived for summer as long as I can remember! I know it won't be this summer and probably not the next.  But it is lurking.  Closer than it ever has been before.  
I literally cannot imagine a summer without camp.  I have been going to the same camp for 14 years.  Camp is a part of me and it always will be.  Sometimes I think about the ways in which camp has effected my life and I am amazed by how immensely my life has been shaped by summer camp people and experiences.  I will be forever grateful that I had the opportunity to experience Camp Cedarledge and I wouldn't change it for anything. 

As a child it was my fun place, a little scary, but a place to make new friends and learn about things I would otherwise never know. 
As a teenage it was my safe place, an escape from the real world and all of the problems that come along with teenage angst.
As a young adult it has become my home.  A place where I can pass traditions and share with younger girls my experiences at camp.  


My heart aches for the smell of Cedar trees and fresh air.  For friends who are very different but all come together.  For seeing smiles on the faces of campers when we end with a Good Night Scouts.  

Green Trees & Taps

Green trees around us

Blue skies above.

Friends all around us

In a world filled with love.

Taps sounding softly

Hearts beating true

As we all say

“Good-night” to you.

Day is done,

Gone the sun

From the lakes

From the hills

From the sky.

All is well

Safely rest

God is nigh.

CEDARLEDGE SONG

The cedar trees are calling

And whispering a tune

For its nature’s peaceful love songs

To the winds they gently croon.

The amber hills are fading

As the sunset’s growing gold,

And the whipporwills are calling

While the moon is growing bold.

Farewell, we take memories

The years cannot fade.

Our Cedarledge friendships,

Our promises made.

In Memory

This post is in memory of my loving Grandfather, Hal Meyer.

Loss is hard and this is how I choose to handle it.
As the tears and words flow, I remember so many things and wish I could just tell my "Gpa Meyer" that I love him one more time.

He was the kind of man who would tell you what you were doing wrong and how to do it better.  He was so strong, smart, and worked so hard for those he loved.  He wore black socks with sandals, in the summer.  He told you exactly what he thought even if it wasn't always nice.  

My earliest memory is visiting my grandpa at his house and making a bird house with him.  My grandpa, the handyman, taught me how to use tools.  Something that lead me many other places in my life.  Our bird house, (he didn't let anyone else help) was white with a green roof and I remember being so proud of learning to build something.

I remember him teasing me about my brand new cell phone and his number was one of the first I even called and saved in my phone.  I don't know how I will ever be able to take that away.  


I wish I could see you just one more time.  But I'm glad to remember you happy, healthy, and feisty (My mom always said I got that from you).

Until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand.  And Let the angels lead you home. 

I miss and love you very much GPa Meyer.

I thought I had it all.

I thought I had it all
I thought I knew what my life was going to be like
I thought it wouldn't change.
I thought I was an expert on this strife
I thought my experience was the ultimate!
And now it has.

I love what my life used to be, my priorities
and now I love it too! Could I really be thinking this
I cannot share

My life has been this so truly for so long.
Where is the love I used to know
Why can I not feel it, not see it anymore.

New adventures may be coming soon.
I cannot wait for them if they do.
With great friends by my side,
I'll take whatever They throw in stride.

I am not worried anymore.
I do not fear the lonely door.
If I leave I'll ne'er return.
Without a look, a glance, a turn.

This is my future that I believe.
How can They live with this, so naive?
Maybe because this was meant to be.
I only wonder why They don't see. 

I never had it, but now I do.

I'm Irish, but I don't believe in luck

I am very proud to be Irish! My last name is Irish and I always consider myself to be mostly Irish although I'm not quite sure of my cultural backgrounds portions.  I love the green, white, and orange flag, the clover, the celtic symbols, and the history!  To know that my ancestors came to this country and overcame all that they did is truly inspirational.  Yeah, the leprechauns, rainbows, and pot of gold stuff is cool, but what most people think is the coolest about the Irish is their luck.  People think that random circumstances that occur and have any sort of positive outcome or beginnings are luck.  I'm not saying that luck doesn't exist...just that I don't really believe in luck.

I think that good things happen to good people, but I don't believe in karma.  I think that chance can sometimes yield in your favor, but I don't think that has anything to do with luck.

I believe it's about attitude.  If you look at life positively then you don't have as much (or anything) to complain about and you can hold your head up and live your life instead of dwelling in the past!  Make life your own.  Live it the way you want to and then you won't have any problems with the things that occur.

As I see it this is the only way to live.  Go with what you've got, and make it great or change it and make it great!

Who wants to live their life moping around and wishing for some luck to make it better?
I sure don't. 
Don't wait for luck, make your own.


That's how they survived.  The Irish.  They had a positive outlook on America.  They knew it would get better. They fought for their happiness.  And I guess that trickled down my heritage line to me.  And good thing it did too :)

That's what I believe is truly the Luck of the Irish.